Love's Changes: A Losing My Way Novella
© 2016 All Rights Reserved
by
LaQuette
Genre: M/M Erotic Romance

Blurb:

A near-fatal shot through his chest teaches Lieutenant Bryan Smyth of the NYPD two things: He wants to live to see more days and he wants to spend them with his estranged husband, Justice.

Poor decisions made under the strain of grief split the seams of their marriage. Now it's up to Bryan to show Justice there's still enough of their love left to salvage from the ruins, still something worth the battle ahead.

Bryan's shooting has opened Justice's eyes to new lessons too. The first, tomorrow isn't promised, the second, life's too short to live in misery. Justice has watched Bryan shuffle back and forth attempting to balance the man he is at home and the man he has to be at the precinct for too long. Now, he's done.

The only problem is Justice's heart is having a hard time adhering to the exit strategy in his head.

Desperate to repair their bond, Bryan does the only thing he can to keep his marriage intact, he calls his crazy sister-in-law, True to stir up some organized chaos. She's a wildcard, yes.  As unstable and deadly as nitroglycerin, but she gets the one thing Bryan needs more than anything, results.

The only question left: Is family and fidelity enough to get them through love's changes, or is this really the end?



Excerpt:

As soon as he heard the lock turn from the outside, Justice was on his feet and heading in the direction of the door.

“It’s two o’ clock in the fucking morning and you’re just dragging your ass in here now?”

Justice watched glass-like eyes stare back at him.  He pulled Bryan by his collar, leaving him close enough to soak up the intoxicating scent of Bryan’s natural man-spice aroma mixed with liquor.

“You went drinking with him?”

Bryan’s eyes focused on him a split second before he pulled out of Justice’s grasp. “Yeah, we had a few, then went to see a movie.  What of it?”

Bryan pushed past him and headed for the bathroom.  He opened his pants and pulled out his long cock before positioning himself in front of the toilet.

“A little privacy?” Bryan quipped.

“Not anything I haven’t seen before.” Justice wedged his shoulder into the doorframe as he watched Bryan.  He had to admit, watching Bryan take a piss wasn’t on his ‘Things that turn me on list’, but he wasn’t about to give Bryan an inch of privacy until he knew every fucking detail of the evening Bryan spent with that fucking Herrera.

Bryan shrugged his shoulders, oblivious to, or unconcerned with, Justice’s building anger, and relieved himself without further thought.  When he was done, he washed his hands, then turned the shower on and adjusted the spray.

As he began to remove his clothing he stopped to look at Justice.  “I’ve had a long day.  I’m gonna take a shower and take my ass to bed.  You wanna fight?  You’ll be fighting alone tonight.”

Without giving Justice another glance, or thought as it appeared, Bryan stepped inside of the darkened shower stall.

Justice stood in the middle of the floor waiting, for what he couldn’t really pinpoint.  Acknowledgement, an explanation, contrition, something from Bryan that expressed some form of regret that he’d done something to piss Justice off, instead Bryan's slightly drunk ass—if his whistling of some pop tune was any indication of his intoxication level—continued on behind the smoky shower glass as if Justice wasn’t even in the room.

Bryan finished his shower, pulled a towel from the nearby rack and tied it around his waist.  He stepped around Justice, and headed for their bedroom. 

Justice tried hard not to stare at Bryan’s water-slicked skin.  Bryan at any given time was a turn-on for him.  Bryan naked and wet looking like something Justice should be licking or sopping up with a biscuit had a way of making him forget his train of thought. 

At the moment Justice knew he was supposed to be mad about something, but watching his man saunter in front of him, shoulders pulled back in confidence, the globes of his ass sitting high and tight, Justice could scarcely remember what he’d eaten for dinner, let alone the complicated trigger to his inner-asshole.

He palmed the hard bulge of his jean-clad cock and closed his eyes, trying his damnedest to remain focused on anything other than being buried in Bryan’s ass.  After a few moments of fighting with his mind and body, he walked into their bedroom.  Bryan was still in his towel, sitting at the edge of the foot of the bed.

“Bryan, I can’t believe you’re really going to let this asshole fuck with your recovery like this.  You fucking know better.  All this jack-off is after is getting a piece of ass.”

“So what if he is?” Bryan’s answer striking a fast and fierce blow to Justice’s chest.  “So what if the only thing he wants from me is a good, hard fuck?  Why the fuck does that matter to you?  Why do you get a say in that?  You just filed divorce papers.  Obviously you don’t care about who fucks me or who I fuck.”

Molten heat carved through the walls of his chest, into the center of his heart.  The gripping pain caused his breath to rush past his lips.

“I will always care about you, Bryan.  About everything you do,” he whispered.
Bryan’s flat palms rested against his spread thighs, holding his heavy shoulders up as they threatened to slump in defeat.

“You don’t act like it.  You act like you don’t want anything to do with me.  Like you hate me,” Bryan flinched as he spoke, like the thought of Justice hating him physically hurt. 

Justice averted his eyes; he knew if he found the same sadness in Bryan’s eyes as he did his words, he was going to crumble right where he stood.

“I’ve never lived in the closet, Bryan.  I’ve been out since I knew what gay meant.  I married you knowing that you weren’t comfortable with your sexuality. That was my fault.  I shouldn’t have fought you over the divorce when you asked me for it.  I should have seen the writing on the wall then.  But I loved you so much, I couldn’t bear to think of walking away.”

“And now you can?” Bryan’s words were quiet, but the question shook him from the inside out making Justice’s body twitch with nervous energy.

No

The small word bounced off the inside of his head and made its way to his hollow heart.  This was killing him.  Letting go of the only man he’d loved, relinquishing his claim on Bryan, it was breaking him.

“What happened while I was in that coma to make you give up on us, Justice?  Why are you so hell-bent on giving up now?” The mixture of frustration and pain in Bryan’s voice was nearly choking Justice.  “For five fucking years I pushed to end our marriage and you refused, you fought for us, even when I couldn’t.  And now that I can finally see what a fool I was you want to bounce?  What made this happen, Justice?”

“I just got tired of being the only one fighting for us.  After watching you nearly die, I didn’t have the energy to come back to us fighting about these same issues.  Your fear to live in the light as a gay man has been slowly killing us for years,” Justice offered.  “I’m just finally giving you the freedom to live as you’ve always wanted, in the shadows.”

Justice heard an audible breath cross Bryan’s lips.  It’s heavy sound pulling his eyes from their current position on the floor to his husband’s face.
He’d expected to find the sadness he’d been avoiding, but instead he found Bryan’s features twisted into an angry scowl. 

“You know what Justice…fuck you!’


Booktrailer:



Author Bio

2015 Swirl Awards Bronze winner in Romantic Suspense, 2015 Georgia Romance Writers Maggie Award Finalist in Erotic Romance, bestselling erotic romance author, LaQuette, is a native of Brooklyn, New York. She spends her time catering to her three distinct personalities: Wife, Mother, and Educator.

Writing--her escape from everyday madness--has always been a friend and comforter. She loves writing and devouring romance novels. Although she possesses a graduate degree in English Lit, she'd forego Shakespeare any day to read something hot, lusty, and romantic.

She loves hearing from readers and discussing the crazy characters that are running around in her head causing so much trouble. Contact her on Facebook, Twitter, her website, NovelsbyLaQuette.com, Amazon, her Facebook group, LaQuette's Lounge, and via email at NovelsbyLaQuette@gmail.com. 


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