Christmas Countdown 2013 - 17 December

My favourite Christmas Music 3rd of 10

Coming in at number 3, one of my most loved Coldplay song, the other being Paradise.

Today's featured Anthology Author is

Allan Jay with his story Christmas Angel

It's the lead up to Christmas and Shaun is looking for love in all the wrong places. With the help of his friend Matt he works his way towards the one present he'd like, but he's in for a surprise. Who will bring him some Christmas cheer? Will it be Santa Claus, an Elf, Rudolph the red nosed reindeer, or a Christmas Angel that he knows so well?

Allan's Special Christmas Memory

Christmas for me is about family, food and fun and I like to spend the day overdosing on all three. My favourite part of the season though is the tree. I like to make an effort on decorating the tree so that it's bright, sparkly and just the right side of gaudy.

Info on Allan Jay

Allan can be found on Facebook here.

Did you like his story? Tell him all about it on Facebook.

Not read it yet? Download the anthology for FREE at Love Lane Books or All Romance eBooks

Mr RJ's Crap Joke Section

WOW!  What a weekend!  RJ and I went out for our annual Christmas party with friends which was held in our local Theatre and we bumped into Brian May (guitarist from British Rock band Queen).  I'm not usually star struck but I understand the fan girling thing now :).  He let me shake his hand, bow before him and he seemed like a thoroughly decent chap but I can tell you that it made my evening. 

I had to spend Sunday helping family with some urgent unplanned DIY and of course the night before I had a bit too much to drink.  Couldn't drive so had a three mile walk home..long story plus I have the cold kindly donated by my son. Something had to give and unfortunately it was the jokes. I did manage the competition however :).

Well the jokes are back tonight and I'll give you a bumper helping to make up. BUT they are possibly the worst so far. First for Nancy 

How do you shoot a blue elephant?
With a blue elephant gun, of course.

How do you shoot a red elephant?
No, not with a red elephant gun. You strangle him until he turns blue, and then shoot him with a blue elephant gun.

How do you shoot a green elephant?
Tell him a dirty joke so he turns red, strangle him until he turns blue, and then shoot him with a blue elephant gun.

How do you shoot a yellow elephant?
Ever seen a yellow elephant?!!!

Why are elephants wrinkled?
Have you ever tried to iron one?

What lies at the bottom of the sea and shivers?
A nervous wreck

What do they sing at a snowman's birthday party?
Freeze a jolly good fellow

What do you get if you cross an orange with a comedian?
Peels of laughter

Why is Europe like a frying pan?
Because it has Greece at the bottom

Who invented fractions?
Henry the 1/8th

How many ears has Captain Kirk got?
Three: the left ear, the right ear, and the final front ear.

A woman walks into a bar and asks for a double entendre…
So the barman gives her one.

I went to the Canary Islands on holiday this year, didn't see one canary.
Going to the Virgin Islands next year, can't wait.

Mary and Joseph... now they had a stable relationship...

How did Mary and Joseph know Jesus was 7lb 6oz when he was born? 
They had a weigh in a manger

I will stop now.... Promise.

The Twenty Five Days of Christmas Competition

For the master post explaining prizes, etc, visit Competition and prizes for the twenty five days of Christmas. Don't forget every entry you make counts towards the grand prize on 25 December. So if you enter every day, you will have 24 chances for to win..

Today enter the competition to win a $10 Amazon Voucher.

Good Luck!!!!!


  1. Yes, the jokes are back and a great bunch today. Thanks Mr RJ, hope everyone feels better.

    1. We're doing okay... still poorly but getting better! HUGS rj x

  2. How cool!!! You met Brian May, Mr RJ??!! That’s wicked awesome!

    Hope that everyone is feeling better now.

    Here are a few more jokes for you:
    Q: If Santa Claus and Mrs. Claus had a child, what would he be called?
    A: Subordinate Claus

    Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
    A: Frostbite.

    Q. What's an ig?
    A. An eskimo's home without a loo!

    **Hugs** to you all!

    1. Sharon! Stop encouraging him... ROFL... HUGS Rj x

  3. I cry UNCLE! I'm really late because the @#***ing computer was giving me fits, maybe I'll make it into tomorrow's draw. Can't tell you how much I am enjoying this.

    1. Awww, Nancy... i hate computers too... so pleased you're enjoying this... HUGS XXX